Special thanks to MrKite456 for the excerpts from "Lincoln's Modern Life".
Chapter 2: Welcome to the Loud House!
The Nicktoons have arrived at Royal Woods, the homeworld of Lincoln.
“So is this how our mission starts?” Korra asked.
“It’ll be a piece of cake.” Donatello said.
“Wow. Are we in heck?” Rocko asked.
“No. This is my house.” Lincoln replied, pointing out his residence.
“It looks like a junkyard.” Arnold commented, witnessing several toys and household stuff scattered around the garden and the house exterior.
“My ten sisters have their own personalities and behaviors. Doesn’t it explain this more?” Lincoln asked.
“I know. It’s the nature of those beasts.” Timmy replied.
Suddenly, violent noises, thuds and crashes can be heard as the Loud family patriarch Mr. Loud and his matriarch Rita storm out the house in terror.
“Mom! Dad! Why are you guys like this?” Lincoln asked, frantic.
“Monsters!!! I’m so afraid of them!” Mr. Loud hollered, in horror.
“Your sisters are in terrible danger! Please help!” Rita hollered.
“Don’t worry, I’ve got some help!” Lincoln said.
The Nicktoons raced inside the Loud residence to find Lincoln’s sisters struggling against some kind of monsters.
“Stay back! Stay away from me, you filthy beasts!” Lola hollered.
“Back off, vile creatures! Back off!” Lana hollered.
“Why won’t you leave me alone?” Lisa asked.
“Oh foul souls let go of your meaningless rage.” Lucy said.
“Die, insects! DIE!!!” Lynn hollered, furiously.
“What? My jokes aren’t funny?” Luan asked.
“Scratch my guitar and you’re DEAD!!!” Luna hollered.
“I thought we were friends!” Leni hollered, whimpering in fear.
“Lincoln! Glad you’re here!” Lana hollered.
“Dude! Who the heck these guys think they are?” Luna asked.
“They’re the excarders!” Lincoln replied.
“We’re here to help you all.” Jimmy explained.
“We’ll fend the excarders off as a family!” Lincoln hollered.
“Sure, dude!” Luna hollered.
The Nicktoons teamed with the Loud sisters to fend the excarders off.
“And don’t you creeps ever step your stinky feet inside our house!” Lola hollered.
“Interesting. You resemble a rock wallaby or a kangaroo.” Lisa explained, examining Rocko.
“I’m a wallaby.” Rocko said.
“Hey, CatDog!” Luna hollered.
“How do you know us?” Dog asked.
“You guys form just one exuberant species.” Luna replied.
“Pleased to meet you, rock lady.” Cat said.
“We’re hungry. This war has already made us starving.” Ren said.
“Totes! Let me show you. Like I could totes make you one of my favorite smoothies.” Leni said, guiding Ren and Stimpy.
“Smoothies! Oh joy!” Stimpy hollered.
“Great. Those girls spill more dirt around this place than my fat-bloated eediot pal.” Ren commented, analyzing the chaotic nature of the Loud sisters.
“Your sisters are genuinely looney, heh?” Rocko asked.
“Yep.” Lincoln replied.
“So, you and your sisters live here?” Rocko asked, examining the Loud residence in awe.
“Yup. We also have pets: a cat named Cliff, a hamster named Geo, a bird named Walt and a dog named Charles.” Lincoln replied.
“That’s a lot of animals.” Rocko commented.
Meanwhile, CatDog was playing fetch with Lynn.
“Hey Cerberus! Think fast!” Lynn hollered, kicking balls towards Dog.
“No! God please, no! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!” Cat shrieked, running away in terror only to be stopped by Lola and Lana.
“Hey beast! Play with us!” Lana and Lola hollered in unison.
“Oooooh, what do you wanna play?” Dog asked, happily.
“CatDog piñata!” Lana and Lola hollered in unison, pulling out their sticks.
“Oh, this is gonna make the Greaser Dogs look more nice to me in comparison.” Cat whimpered, getting his and Dog’s tail kicked gruesomely by both girls.
Back to the kitchen, Stimpy and Leni are drinking an array of smoothies.
“OMG! You can stomach anything! I’ve never see anyone eat a triple bean burrito bologna sandwich baroquely mix smoothy before.” Leni said in amazement.
“Look at this bloated sack. Hogging all the stuff he sees.” Ren said, sarcastically.
“Hey there, kangaroo thingy.” Leni greeted.
“Hello. Ummm...what’s your name?” Rocko asked.
“I’m Leni. Did you and the others get a chance to meet my family yet.” Leni asked with a smile.
“Sure. Everyone is getting to know each other.” Rocko replied.
CatDog ran screaming as Lana and Lola entered the diner room.
“Hey Leni, have you seen that CatDog hybrid? He say he wanted to play but then ran away.” Lana whined.
“Yeah! He’s gonna play with us whether he likes it or not!” Lola shouted.
“Thanks for saving our kids.” Mr. Loud said.
“It was just a little warm-up.” Jimmy explained.
“You’re very sweet. But where’s Lori?” Rita asked.
Lori suddenly appeared with glowing red eyes.
“Lori! What in the world is wrong with you?” Lincoln asked, freaked out.
“She’s being controlled by the excarders!” Jimmy replied.
“Lincoln Loud! Tell me what is this doing in my room?” Lori asked.
“I don’t know, what is that thing?” Lincoln asked.
“Hey look! It’s a key with your face and ours!” Lynn replied.
“Can you please give our key back please? We promise we won’t trespass your room again with no permission.” Luan asked.
“No! I’ll keep this key with me and use it to literally turn my stupid brother into a human pretzel!” Lori replied, clenching her teeth.
“You mess with your own bro, you mess with our whole family!” Lynn hollered.
“Let’s teach her a lesson!” Jimmy hollered.
Everyone started to fight the excarder-possessed Lori. However, she acted worse than she would understandably be.
“You may seem bossy and mean, but you’ve definitely crossed the line!” Lola hollered.
“Clyde! I’ve got a big sister problem here!” Lincoln hollered, calling his best friend Clyde McBride on his cellphone.
Big sister problem again? This time is really serious! I’m on it, Linky!” Clyde hollered, turning his cellphone off.
Clyde desperately stormed into the Loud residence to help Lincoln and his sisters win this ugly battle.
“Lincoln! Girls! Don’t worry, let’s see if I can handle...” Clyde said.
Then, Clyde witnessed Lori assaulting poor Lincoln.
“L-Lo-Lori!” Clyde hollered.
Clyde’s nose started bleeding on Lori’s shoes enough to snap her out of it.
“YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!” Lori shrieked, striping herself from the Excarders’ influence. They finally left the Loud residence for good to never ever return.
“Lori! I’m glad to have you back!” Lincoln hollered, hugging Lori.
“Lincoln! I’m literally so sorry! What had I really done?!” Lori asked, fueled with guilt.
“It’s not your fault. You’re not actually bad. You were just being controlled like a puppet.” Lincoln replied, comforting Lori.
“Thanks, Linc. But what is this key with your and our faces doing in my pocket?” Lori asked.
“It’s our key, Lori.” Lincoln replied.
“We need this and the others to stop Alzarax.” Jimmy explained.
“Lincoln, who is this Alzarax?” Clyde asked.
“The one who wants to turn me into a human pretzel before Lori does.” Lincoln replied.
“And we’re getting more allies to make sure he can’t do this to the Loud family.” Jimmy explained.
“If you insist, allow us to introduce ourselves. I’m Lori, the oldest and the mother figure to my siblings.” Lori explained, introducing herself to the Nicktoons.
“And I’m Leni... Wait, you guys already know me.” Leni explained, walking up.
“I’m Luna, ladies and gentlemen, dudes and dudettes.” Luna explained, pulling out her guitar and jumping into Timmy’s body.
“OWWWWWW!!!! My ribs! My back!” Timmy roared in pain and agony, feeling the crushing of his bones.
“Sorry dude.” Luna said, rolling a finger under Timmy’s chin and winking at him.
“I’m Luan, an up and coming comedian.” Luan explained, extending her hand to Jimmy who gets electrocuted in the process. Her flower sprays the other heroes with water.
“Ha ha ha. Very funny.” Korra commented, annoyed.
“I’m Lynn, the champion.” Lynn explained, walking up.
“You tried to assassinate us with your balls!” Cat hollered, freaking out at what happened to him earlier.
Lynn chuckled nervously.
“I’m Lucy. I love writing poetry. I wrote this one and it’s called heroes. My heroes, you came from a dimensional hole. You guys look a bit weird, but life is sweet.” Lucy explained, reading a piece of paper to Danny, Ickis and El Tigre’s delight.
The twins Lana and Lola walked up to the heroes, causing Norbert and Dagget to freak out.
“I’m Lana.” Lana introduced herself.
“I’m Lola.” Lola introduced herself.
“Sorry about trying to hit CatDog like a piñata.” Both apologized.
“It’s ok.” Dog said.
“The Greaser Dogs always do worse to us. Hero shall not kill hero.” Cat explained.
“I’m Lisa. And I’ll offer my scientific and technological services to this hero team.” Lisa explained, showing the heroes her diploma and her Nobel Prizes.
“And this is our youngest sister Lily.” Lincoln explained, introducing a babbling Lily to the Nicktoons who awwwwwwed.
“Now that we’ve finished our introductions, we’re all on this together, as a loud and proud family.” Lori said.
“One boy and his ten sisters against a evil mastermind will be its downfall.” Lynn said.
“We’ll rock ‘n roll him and the excarders by all means necessary!” Luna hollered.
“Hey! Don’t forget about your best friend!” Clyde hollered.
“Oooh, what a cute floppy-eared red monster.” Lana said, looking at Ickis.
“Whoa-whoa-whoa, I’m not what you’re thinking!” Ickis hollered, choked by Lana’s hugging.
“It’s a pleasure to know you.” Lily said, already translated from baby language.
“It’s a great honor to have you in our team.” Tommy Pickles said.
“We should get going now.” Leonardo said.
“I think that the old hermit crab might have an idea about those keys.” Jimmy said.
“It was fun visiting this world!” SpongeBob hollered.
“Really fun!” Patrick hollered.
“Behave properly!” Rita hollered.
“We don’t want to lose our precious babies!” Mr. Loud hollered.
“We’ll be okay.” Lincoln said.
“As long as I stay with your offspring.” Clyde said.
“Clincoln McLoud ready to save the universe!” Lincoln and Clyde hollered in unison.
A portal opened up and the Nicktoons went inside it, heading back to Volcano Island.
“Yo geriatric crab, what’s this key made for?” Lynn asked.
“Can’t say that I know. It’s a big mystery to me too.” The Wise Old Crab said.
“Maybe it’s for a giant robot!” Stimpy said.
“Don’t spoil it, you eediot!” Ren hissed, slapping Stimpy in the face.
“I can do exposition better than this kitty.” Leni commented.
“Or a sword!” Timmy said.
“Definitely a sword!” Cosmo said.
“You three have watched too many Star Wars.” Wanda said.
“Oh, I almost forgot! The excarders are surfacing into more worlds!” The hermit crab said.
Images of the excarders started appearing in the map.
“This is really bad.” Danny said.
“We can’t let this continue any longer!” Arnold said.
“So this is how our first family adventure begins. Sigh.” Lucy said.
“So, which world should we jump to next?” Tak asked.
“Let’s head to the Pickles Residence. Tommy’s baby friends might be in big serious trouble.” Eliza replied.
“No problem! We Louds are the most proficient babysitters ever and we sure can deal with this!” Lori said.
“Can we both babysit them?” Lincoln and Lynn asked in unison.
“Sure I can oversee Lynn’s babysitting chores!” Clyde said.
“Ummmm....fine.” Lori said.
“Clincoln McLoud at the babies’ service!” Lincoln and Clyde hollered in unison.
A portal has surfaced, leading the Nicktoons to the Pickles Residence.
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